Child Funny Jokes

Child Funny Jokes

Q: Why did the computer go to the doctor?
A: It had a blue tooth.

Q: Why can’t your nose be 12 inches long?
A: Because then it would be a foot.

Q: How do you get a tissue to dance?
A: You put a little boogie in it

Q: Why did they quit giving tests at the zoo?
A: Because it was full of cheetahs

Q: Why is a bad joke like a pencil?
A: Because it has no point

Q: Where do polar bears keep their money?
A: A snow bank.

Q: What room can no one enter?
A: A mushroom

Q: What kind of key can never unlock a door?
A: A monkey

Q: What has four wheel and flies?
A: A garbage truck

Q: Why do graveyards have a fence around them?
A: Because people are dying to get in.

Q: What did the cheerleader say to the ghost?
A: Show your spirit.

Q: What did one eye say to the other?
A: Between you and me something smells.

Q: What do you call fake noodles?
A: Im-pasta

Q: How does the ocean say hello?
A: It waves

Q: What do you call cheese that is not yours?
A: Nacho cheese

Q: What does a nosey pepper do?
A: Gets jalapeno your business

Q: What do you call a pig that knows karate?
A: Pork Chop

Q: Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?
A: Because she will let it go

Q: What is the smartest kind of bee?
A: A spelling bee

Q: Why do bees have sticky hair?
A: They use a honey comb

Q: What do you get when you cross an elephant and a potato?
A: Mashed potatoes

Q: What do you call an old snowman?
A: Water

Q: Why is a baseball stadium always cool?
A: It is full of fans

Q: Why did Santa go to music school?
A: So he could improve his wrapping skills

Q: Why couldn’t the pirate learn the alphabet?
A: Because he was always lost at C

Q: What did the man say when he walked into a bar?
A: Ouch!

Q: What are the strongest days of the week?
A: Saturday and Sunday. Every other day is a weekday

Q: What goes tick-tock and woof-woof?
A: A watchdog

Q: What do you call a monkey that loves potato chips?
A: A chipmonk

Q: What did the girl ocean say to the boy ocean when he asked her out on a date?
A: Shore

Q: Why do shoemakers go to heaven?
A: Because the have good soles

Q: What did one plate say to another plate?
A: Dinner is on me

Q: Why did they bury the battery?
A: Because it was dead.

Q: What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence?
A: Time to get a new fence

Q: Why don’t dinosaurs eat clowns?
A: Because they taste funny

Q: Why did the girl throw a stick of butter?
A: She wanted to see a butter fly

Q: What did the finger say to thumb?
A: I’m in glove with you

Q: What has only one eye, but still can’t see?
A: A needle

एक बच्चा एक किताब पढ़ रहा था, जिसका टाइटल था, ‘बच्चों का सही पालन पोषण’
बच्चे की मां: बेटा तुम यह किताब क्यों इतना ध्यान देकर पढ़ रहे हो?
बच्चा: मैं यह देखना चाहता हूं कि मेरा पालन-पोषण ढंग से हो रहा है या नहीं।

दुकानदार से छोटा बच्चा – अंकल…! रंग गोरा करने वाली क्रीम है….।
दुकानदार – हां, है….।
बच्चा – तो लगाते क्यों नहीं, मैं रोज आपको देखकर डर जाता हूं…।

एक बार नर्सरी के बच्चे ने एक्जाम शीट पर सू सू कर दिया।
टीचर – यह क्या किया है?
बच्चा – मम्मी ने कहा था कि पहले जो आ रहा हो, वही करना।

बच्चे ने किताब पढ़ते हुए अपने पिता से पूछा – सहायक का मतलब क्या है?
पिताजी- सहायक का मतलब है किसी का काम करना।
बच्चा- तो फिर आप मां के सहायक हैं!

बच्चा पुरानी एल्बम देखते हुए
मम्मी ये फोटो में तुम्हारे साथ कौन है?
मम्मी : ये तेरे पापा हैं।।
बच्चा : तो हम इस गंजे के साथ क्यों रहते हैं।

विज्ञापनो की मम्मी कितनी अच्छी होती है.
बच्चे कपड़े गंदे करके आए तो भी हँस के धोती है.
बचपन में जब हम कपडे गंदे कर के आते थे,
तो पहले हम धुलते थे,
बाद में कपड़े!!

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